See this baby goat? If you think you do, you are wrong! This is not a goat at all! It is actually a Tyrannosaurus rex, craftily disguised as a cute baby goat. It might have fooled you, but it does not fool me for a minute! Tomorrow this vile creature is going off to meet its maker, and I am the one sending it there. I believe that is what George Washington would have wanted --  him and Benjamin Franklin’, and Tom Hanks, and the other flounders of the proud nation of the United Skates of Americramp. If it wasn’t for me, this thing would be stomping around the neighborhood, laying waste to much of downtown Kinshasa. It would be just like that tsunami some years back, only this time, there is somebody watching out for all of the unsuspecting individuals who lie in its wake. Yes -- it is a job that will go largely unrecognized, and for that, I am fully prepared. I am not doing this for fame, or fortune... just doing my part for my fellow human beings. You can thank me later if you want to, but if you don’t, that is okay. The continued survival of my fellow  Marsneylanders is thanks enough... plus, we will feast on the flesh of this beast tomorrow, and know deep down in our hearts that the Lucky Lord is looking out for us. Thank you, Lucky Lord! Thank you!

    Seriously though—my involvement in dispatching a goat is due to my long-standing belief that if you cannot kill an animal with your own hands, you should not be eating them.  If paying someone to do your dirty work (and the denial that it implies) is required for you to dine on the flesh of your fellow animals, I am of the opinion that you have some pretty serious moral considerations to ponder…  I am now in a situation that provides me with an opportunity to walk my talk; and I am game.

    There is no Internet at home again tonight, so I was forced into having a pleasant conversation with my roommate instead. Oh, the horrors! I do believe that this is one of the trials that the Not-So-Lucky-Lord has rolled out for me. If this keeps up, I might actually have a prolonged, direct connection to “reality”. I knew there was some reason that people stayed away from this heinous country... I have opted to come to my room, and sit here, doing a blog entry while my room cools down with the air conditioner turned on full blast. Once it is properly frigid to the point to where I can turn it off, and record a Float-E-Cast. It is almost to the point now.

    Soon it will be the 4th of July, and I will be chomping lizard flesh. I hope you will be as well! Do you want to get the low down dope? Go check out the Float-E-Cast, episode #237, and I will fill your ass in.  Don’t be a pervert... you know what I mean... I mean I will have carnal relations with your nethers.